I am sitting in Panera.
Just a teeny bit discouraged.
And just a bit emotional as well.
Sitting here I was reminded of the day I wrote my very first blog post. It was then that I was reminded of true heartache and that this seriously momentary affliction will pass.
Yet, I am still human and in my weakness I sit here looking like a complete crazy person crying in Panera. Who does that?
I guess I do.
I think the internet world allows us to project a very put-together version of ourselves. A version of us that never misses a deadline, is always wearing the perfect wardrobe, living in a clean-never-messy-beautifully decorated house and a refrigerator stocked full of organic food for the children who never misbehave.
To be honest, many of my days, especially in the past few weeks, are just plain hard. And probably ugly. (insert: stomping feet and a desire to throw things.)
I wrote multiple blog posts this past week. None of them were ever posted. Why? Because among other things, this work-at-home mama faced a no internet battle the entire week and many of the days over the period of the past month since we moved into the new house. On Thursday alone I spend 4 hours on the phone trying to resolve the issue. It is seemingly so menial but when you begin receiving emails from clients saying that have decided to go in another direction because they have not heard from you, your tough exterior begins to break a little.
So, today I am just a real person, fighting silly little battles that turn into big mountains that seem, at times, impossible to climb. Maybe by Monday I will be back to a normal routine with something fun to show you!
Lots of love. (and many thanks for understanding... and letting me cry sometimes.)